whoever said happiness is sunshine...

darn...

2007-06-25T07:20:29Z

So I know that I haven't visited people in a while and I know that alot of people are gone from shorecrest from graduating and everything but I still want to see all of you again. I know I missed Caien Lada which sucks donkey nuts but I was at work and havent thought of a way to see people again. So this is my mass call out, I miss you guys and I would like to see you again sometime soon. If it helps to convince anyone to see me I have kittens and would be willing to bring some of them, they need socilization anyway. Hopefully someone responds to this. Anyway...hugs.

um....

2007-02-01T19:38:57Z

Wow, who changed the update format?
It looks funny....onto what I really wanted to talk about though.
I might have a job, I know that sounds weird but I will possibly be working at the bakery that Lisa does, "Kitty Hugs Bakery".
I needed to get my food handlers permit, which I did yesterday, and today I will be going in for an orientation thing and then I have a two week trial period to see if they like me and if the job will work out.
I am really excited though because the employer/owner only has people who are in school working for her so she is willing to work with school schedules and stuff.
Im excited.

In other news I am sick, I think, so I dont know if they are just going to send me home today so I am not around the food when I get another coughing fit like I had earlier when I was talking too much. My throat decided that it wanted to hate me and told me to shut up by not allowing me to do anything but cough. I am rather sure that I have a sore throat and a cold but I could be wrong. Hopefully it is nothing too serious.

deranged_aries @ 2006-12-04T17:09:00

2006-12-05T00:09:46Z

So I have decided that I really HATE paper.....and tape. Stupid work.
The job that I am doing currently beats my hands up really bad. They keep getting dried out because I am playing with paper and tape that is stealing the soft squishy moisture from my hands.

That and paper is heavy, my shoulders and back are killing me right now and I could really use a masage but other than that I'm fine.

So because I only know that Anna reads this, not sure if anyone else does (if you do hi to you too)
hello sexy, how is school doing?
Did you get your draft back on the graphic novel essay? If so can I read it? I know you did a kickass job on it and I am curious.
::HUGS:: for the lady.

Excitement

2006-10-10T21:12:28Z

I finaly have a car agian. It is a cute little 91' Saturn SL2. 4 cylendar 5 speed manual that gets like 30 MPG city. It rocks, I'm excited.

Anna's journal told me to

2006-10-07T07:12:24Z

1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:

HERE COMES THE FUN ... ... ...

1. Do we know each other outside of Live Journal?
2. Whats your philosophy on life?
3. Would you have my back in a fight?
4. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
5. What is your favorite memory of us?
6. Would you give me a kidney?
7. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
8. Would you take care of me when I'm sick?
9. Can we get together and make a cake?
10. Have you heard any rumors of me lately?
11. Do you/have you talk(ed) crap about me?
12. Do you think I'm a good person?
13. Would you drive across country with me?
14. Do you think I'm attractive?
15. If you could change anything about me, would you?
16. What do you wear to sleep?
17. Would you come over for no reason just to hang out?
18. Would you go on a date with me if i asked you?
19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
20. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?

deranged_aries @ 2006-09-28T10:28:00

2006-09-28T17:38:20Z

So I am finaly getting a chance to write, not having a computer kinda limits things alot.
On the 16th, which was about a week and a half ago, I was in my first car accident.
It wasnt my fault though and I am not injured so far as I know.
Because I know people are going to ask what happened, I was driving along 35th and I got to the intersection of 65th continuing forward with a green light when a asian lady in a large SUV decides to turn left in front of me causing me to hit her rear pasenger door. It took two hours for the cops to show up because there was a Huskies football game, and a Cougars football game and we all know how important thoes are. When the cop finaly shows up he talks to the lady and tells her (politely of course) that she is an idiot and should learn to drive and make sure that when she is turning she isnt going to be a danger to herself or anyone arround her and make sure she has room because she was trying to say it was my fault when I had skid marks from the crosswalk on and our stories matched. Again, he told her she was stupid, in only that special way a cop can.

Im fine, like I said, I just dont have a car anymore and car shopping really sucks, and Adrian no, I dont want Tims car.

The good news is that we got 3 times what we paid for the car though, so I can get a relatively nice one.

and now for the news....

2006-08-22T21:10:00Z

Wow, I haven't written in here in a while.
Although, not a lot has been going on in my life.

There are a few new things though. I now have a job, at least for
the next 30 days, but it is a job none the less.
Slightly less recent is the fact that I am taking care of 4 kittens.
If anyone remembers I take care of cats for the Seattle Animal Shelter.
They have their spay and neuter appointments on September 12, so Hex,
you should be able to pick Pip up some time after that. You can go to the
Shelter at any time and say that you want to adopt him but that he is still
in foster care. I can get you his case number if you need that.

Anyway, it sucks that I havent seen most people in a long time but that is
just as much my fault as it is theirs.

Hugs for all.

deranged_aries @ 2006-07-17T20:32:00

2006-07-18T03:52:48Z

ok, I know iI havent been on line that often, but what the fuck is wrong with everyone. Jesus christ I thought people had gotten over the fucking "rape" it was over a year ago. Emily, I was okay with you, I was okay with Phil saying it was partly my fault in my yearbook, I had forgoten it but you can't seem to drop it.
I understand the fact that you don't like Adrian and Nathan anymore and thats fine. I never brought it up in conversation with you because of that fact and out of respect for you. What I don't get is why, if you hate them so much, do you read Adrians livejournal. It seems like you almost want everyone to never get over anything and move on with their lives.

Now, I am usualy a forgiving person but I cant forgive people again this time.
Emily:Insulting both by boyfriend and my friend. I know you dislike it when people insult Phil. Accusing him of cheating on me more than once, with Adrian and many different women apparently. I know that you had his penis in your mouth, however i don't think things went exactally as you say, I'm not saying they went exactaly as Nathan says either. I have heard 4 different versions of what went on and I dont know which one is truly correct or even if none of them are.
Phil : one thing I have wanted to know is how the Fuck can that be my fault in anyway shape or form?
John: (since Emily brought you up) I want to know where the fuck you get off telling EVERYONE at school about this. I talked to people this year that admited to me that you told them about this. People who didn't even know Emily or Adrian Or Nathan. How the Hell can you reason your ass out of this one. You had NO right to tell anyone, for a few reasons. Emily told you, I'm guessing that at the time Emily didn't want everyone to know she was "raped" and I sure as hell didn't want everyone at school to know that my boyfriend cheated on me.

YOU ALL JUST NEED TO GET THE FUCK OVER IT AND YOURSELVES!

deranged_aries @ 2006-01-25T10:11:00

2006-01-25T18:17:46Z

i really want school to end. i was in health class today and we were watching a movie about relationships and it got me thinking. about how much it SUCKS that i only get to see Nathan once a week, MAYBE.
i know there are reasons, like the fact that he has work and gets home arround 7:30, but that doesnt change the fact that it sucks.

Whats even worse is the fact that there are couples among my friends, and i am not blaming you guys for anything, it just makes that fact hit a little harder.

i am sorry if by this post i make any of my friends feel like i am wanting them to change, im not. be happy.

deranged_aries @ 2006-01-22T14:11:00

2006-01-22T22:08:20Z

god damn it, i hate school

senior-itis finally hit, hard. i am really not caring anymore, however i know that if i dont graduate i will most likely get killed by my mom. if i fail a class i will get grounded untill i am 20. i hope it loosens at the begining of next semester because this sucks.

i have 3 major projects due tomorow and only one is completely finished. i know that it is my fault for that but i still think it sucks.

i just want to not have to care anymore

deranged_aries @ 2005-11-07T10:24:00

2005-11-07T18:24:31Z

What Icons are for you?(Thank you for #1!! Please check out my other Memes!!) by ladyallie
Username
Favourite Colour
Sex
Your Love icon is...
Your Sexy Icon is...
Your Animal Icon is...
Your Sad Icon is...
Your Random Icon is...
Your Happy Icon is...
Your Food Icon is...
Your Cartoon Icon is...
Your Angry Icon is...

Quiz created with MemeGen!

::SIGH::

2005-10-25T02:08:44Z

wow crazieness
i havent updated this thing in forever, i guess i just never got arround to it

school is just getting crazy
life in general is crazy

the senior project needs to die
and i am again seeming to have my friends suddenly split
i am tired of walking on eggshells arround people, and having to plan the things i do with my friends so tightly so that the ones who hate eachother never have to be in the same room. of having to watch what i say so that i dont accidentally say someones name or refer to them in the presence of others. i dont know i just wish that life wasnt so stupid sometimes

deranged_aries @ 2005-07-25T01:49:00

2005-07-25T08:49:53Z

IM BACK

i got home today, actually technically it was yesterday, at about 8ish.
ive been gone for the past month so i have no idea what all the new drama is, although i am trying to catch up by reading peoples journals. now that i am home PLEASE call me to hang out some time. i misses all of yous and really want to see you again. if anyone dosent know where i was they can ask.

also i would like to appologise to everyone who i may have offended or hurt at all, in any way, for whatever reason. i got to thinkin on my trip, alot of time makes you do that, but i realised that i have been a bitch in the past, or at least i thought that i was being one, and i would like to take this tim to appologise to you.

if anyone is angry or upset with me let me know. if i did something that hurt you let me know so that i wont do it again. i like to know what i do wrong, i try really hard to be a nice person but i dont always acheive that so i am sorry.

deranged_aries @ 2005-06-01T11:43:00

2005-06-01T18:55:23Z

life for once it seems is going rather okay. there are no "large" feelings of inadequecy or abandonment. im not pissed off for one reason or another and thusly i havenot written in forever. however there is still the perpetual feeling that i am not wanted. but that is a feeling that i have grown to live with, it is in every aspect of my being and day to day life. i come to school and have people i care about but am not sure they return the feelings, i still hang out with them and feel like they put up with me and my stupid little quirks. i return to my house and my mother makes me feel like i am not good enough to be her daugter and that somehow i am a continuous dissapointment in her life. when i go hang out with my friends after school it is the same feeling of being pur up with and not truly accepted. the only time that i feel that i truly belong is when i am alone with nathan, i feel like i can truly be myself without the fear of rejection or fearing that people will hate me for what i am.

i know that it may seem like i am just being a whinner and i know that no one will take the time to read this but i would just like to know one thing. how many people actually read this thing and how many of you actually care about me. thats actually two things but they are questions that haunt my being

deranged_aries @ 2005-05-11T11:21:00

2005-05-11T18:25:44Z

retarded randomness by tweekyx12
username
thinks youre sexy	merc_in_midgard
wants your soul	greenspyders
thinks youre the awesome-est	chexmixx
is very strange	turtlekisses
dreams about you	happylittlepony
youre worth	$693,909,190
would pay that much for you	chokeweed22
is in love with you	sky_cleod
needs a life	komischqd
stalks you	unfortunatebob
cant live without you	drew4484

Quiz created with MemeGen!

deranged_aries @ 2005-05-11T11:16:00

2005-05-11T18:21:08Z

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to good manners and elegance.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

deranged_aries @ 2005-05-06T10:12:00

2005-05-06T17:17:57Z

Your Birthdate: March 29

Your birthday on the 29th adds a tone of idealism to your nature.

You are imaginative and creative, but rather uncomfortable in the business world.

You are very aware and sensitive, with outstanding intuitive skills and analytical abilities.

The 29 reduces to 11, one of the master numbers which often produces much nervous tension.

This is the birthday of the dreamer rather than the doer.

You do, however, work very well with people.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

deranged_aries @ 2005-04-29T11:48:00

2005-04-29T18:56:52Z

sometimes i feel like im just there...like no one really wants me to be there but i am so they deal with it, and me.

what am i to all of you?...i consider all of you to be my friends but im not sure if that is what you want. i know i dont write in this thing often enough for people to bother checking, let alone to bother responding

i feel so alone sometimes and i hate it, im a mooch and i know it but i still cant help wanting to be arround people and to be accepted by you.

i shouldnt bother with what people think but it is constantally on my mind
...im gunna shut up now

deranged_aries @ 2005-04-27T12:07:00

2005-04-27T19:11:56Z

img src="http://images.quizilla.com/P/PainfulBliss/1113327166_ote.friend.JPG" border="0" alt="Friend antiques">
Your wise quote is: "The best antiques are old
friends" by Unknown...
Your buds is the source of your happiness
(maybe not all but still). Even if it's just
one, a couple or a whole group they are the
ones you can't wait to see. It does not matter
if you're shy with everyone else or not, with
them you let your true spirit shine and can be
as loud as you want. They accept you, and you
love them for that.

What wise quote fits you?(pics) UPDATED
brought to you by Quizilla

deranged_aries @ 2005-04-27T11:51:00

2005-04-27T18:56:38Z

You Are A Hazelnut Tree

You're a charmer with a killer sense of humor.

You are very demanding, but you can also be very understanding.

No matter what, you always make a lasting impression - you're quite popular.

Passionate, you are an active fighter for social causes and politics.

In general, you are moody, honest, a perfectionist, and very sexual.

What is Your Celtic Horoscope?

i personally dont think it fits me but my horiscopes dont always work

deranged_aries @ 2005-04-27T11:48:00

2005-04-27T18:52:21Z

You're a little gold key, and you unlock other
people's hearts. Your kindness and willingness
to be there for those you care about lets
people open up to you knowing they will be
accepted. People will rely on you, but be
careful not to give more than you have.

What sort of key are you and what do you unlock?
brought to you by Quizilla

deranged_aries @ 2005-04-02T23:21:00

2005-04-03T07:16:33Z

Life sucks....
....then you die

yay for life

2005-03-14T06:53:02Z

here is a list of events that have happened in my life since the last entry.
1. i began babysitting children with downs syndrome once a week for 6 weeks.
2. i began babysitting a friend of the familys daughter ellen.
3. went to tattoo coffee house and then went bowling under the alias of Tony
4. had a meeting for my youth group (im kinda like the president) in which we had a lot of business, one 45minute ceremony, one 30 minute ceremony and one 15 minute ceremony and got out of there in 3 hours where as it would have taken a lot longer elsewhere.
5. babysat downs kids.
6. saw macbeth at the uw with class and had a good time.
7. had 1 year and 6month aniversary with nathan.
8. babysat for my choir teacher.
9. see #5
10. babysat ellen.
11. my older sister moved out, turned 20 and got engaged in the span of 3days.
12. i became the oldest person in my youth group out of 12.(only 3, including me, are over the age of 12
13. babysat ellen.
14. had a choir concert.

lots of babysitting and not a whole lot else. kinda boring.

whatever.

i just got back from being gone all weekend with all the little children, plus 3, from my youth group. we were all in moses hole(lake) and i am hurting and tired and i stll have homework so im gunna stop typing now

deranged_aries @ 2005-01-08T20:17:00

2005-01-09T04:18:33Z

sorry about that last post
i just felt really depressed for some reason and wrote things that i never told anyone before and now anyone who reads can know

thanks to anyone who cares about me, i know i dont show my appreciation for you guys enough and i just wanted to thank you for everyting

on to happier subjects

i hate math projects
i have one that is due on monday and i cant find all of the information i need because the internet sucks and you can only find everything you need if you speak geek-speak

what ever

sometimes it is nice though, to be alone in your house and sit back all day in your pjs and bathrobe not doing anything or worring about anything

::sigh::

anyway.....yah

deranged_aries @ 2004-12-31T00:12:00

2004-12-31T08:24:51Z

i fucking hate life. depression is startin to get to me. sharp shiny objects are startin to attract but i at least know i can stand not to go for them. i have self control so yea. i could never kill myself but fuckin god damnit i hate being down. i want to fucking be happy. if i told you that i have thought about suicide multiple times what would you do. i have been depressed before. i wrote about it once in this thing because i thought SOMEONE would care but all my typing efforts proved to be in vain so i didnt write about it anymore. NO ONE FUCKING CARED ENOUGH ABOUT ME to try and cheer me up. i know you read my journal because everynow and then someone replys. but now i am so sick and tired of putting on a mask to hide my disgust at myself for being such a selfish little BITCH for hoping and thinking that people who said they were my friends actually were and acctually cared about me. so go ahead and forget about me to go back to your own little world

obviously me being depressed is outside of your reality tunnel so this entry is going to be shruged off as someone else. you all think that i am sam the happy and the person who never has problems and always is there to help you. the last part is true because i care about you people even if the care isnt returned

if you want to know my problems feel free to ask because i am not going to write them for people to judge or rate them next to their problems.

whatever

im gunna shut up now